Tactical insights for first-time founders to outsmart the burn, the churn & the breakdown.
Hey Founder,
You’ve pitched the same 20 VCs so many times that you could deliver their objections better than their analysts.
Meanwhile, there’s a $7T wealth pool most founders ignore: family offices.
They’re not just rich. They’re patient, values-driven, and allergic to VC-style FOMO. You won’t see them at demo days or tweeting hot takes, but they quietly back founders they believe in for the long haul.
This week: how family offices actually work, what they look for, and how to get on their radar.
(Psst.. let me tell you a secret: if you’re only chasing VCs, you’re leaving the real money off the table)
The Margin
How Family Offices Invest Differently
VCs give you ~5 years, board strings, and a ticking exit clock.
Family offices now deploy 31% of startup capital and control $7T+ with patient money, flexible terms, and founder-friendly structures that let you build a legacy, not just chase headlines.
Epic Games x LEGO: KIRKBI (the LEGO family) backed Fortnite not for hype, but to shape safer digital spaces for kids. Try asking your VC to hold through three pivots and a regulatory storm.
Oatly x Verlinvest: When Oatly stalled, AB InBev’s Verlinvest plugged them into global distribution, landing in China, while keeping the mission intact.
The thread?
Family offices don’t just add capital. They move markets, hardwire values, and give founders staying power that VCs can’t.
Why You Should Care
1. Less noise, more spotlight
Family offices quietly write a third of the checks VCs do, but get pitched a fraction as often. Less competition = more attention for your story.
2. Terms that fit, not trap
Forget the five-year exit clock. Family offices play long, with room for revenue share, minority stakes, or custom structures that keep you in control.
3. Money + muscle
They don’t just wire funds. They open doors, suppliers, talent, and partnerships in industries they’ve dominated for decades.
Tiny Reframe: Insider Trust > Founder FOMO
Most founders imagine family offices as some velvet-rope, “members only” club. Truth is, they’re just private people who move on trust, not hype.
They almost never take cold pitches. Deals flow through their inner circle: lawyers, accountants, private bankers, boutique funds. Those are the gatekeepers. That’s your way in.
So don’t burn hours blasting cold emails into the void. Instead, work the edges. Get a warm intro from a founder they already back. Or better yet, earn the trust of their advisors, the ones whose call they’ll always take.
Understanding Family Offices (Without Losing Your Mind)
Two main types:
1. Single-Family Offices (SFOs): One family, full control. Lean teams, hands-on. You’ll pitch the CIO or even the principal. Personal fit matters more than deck polish.
2. Multi-Family Offices (MFOs): Shared teams across wealthy families. More layers, broader view. Target the Director of Alternatives (or similar). Warm intros are key.
But.. not every family office plays in startups. Look for venture DNA: ex-VCs, founder backgrounds, or ambitious next-gen heirs.
From the CFO seat: don’t chase whales. Stack smaller, values-aligned “club” checks. Fit beats check size. And when it clicks, the best offices syndicate with peers they already trust
Mechanics of Single Family Offices
How to Reach Out Without Sounding Desperate
Family offices don’t scroll LinkedIn for deals or answer cold blasts. Their world runs on trust and reputation.
For SFOs: Go direct. Target the CIO, CEO, or even the principal, if you have a warm path. These teams are lean, and every pitch feels personal. The first question will be: “Who introduced you?”
For MFOs: Expect more structure. Find the Director of Alternatives or the person leading venture. Your best shot is through trusted channels: private bankers, lawyers, or foundations that already sit in their orbit.
Margin Moves (Building a Rejection Muscle That Actually Serves You)
1. Audit & Filter
Don’t waste cycles chasing whales. Scrub your investor pipeline and flag only the family offices that actually invest in startups.
Shortlist five that overlap with you, by industry, values, or geography, and ignore the rest.
2. Research for Relevance
Go deeper than “they invest in tech.” How did they make their fortune? What legacy do they care about?
Scan recent deals and note repeat themes. Use that intel to craft a “why us” that speaks their language, not just your deck.
3. Map the Trust Network
Family offices buy trust before deals.
Comb through press releases, filings, and deal notes for recurring advisors, lawyers, boutique PE shops, private bankers. Those names are the real gatekeepers. Build credibility there first.
4. Build the One-Pager
Skip the deck tsunami. Create a crisp, one-page PDF that covers: the problem you solve, traction and metrics, use of funds, downside protection, and exit paths.
Old money loves clarity, brevity, and something they can forward in two clicks.
5. Get in the Room
Deals get done in salons, not spam folders. Search “family office summit” or “impact investing forum” on Eventbrite, Glue Up, and Campden Wealth. Many are open tickets.
Follow hosts, bankers, and foundations; they announce gatherings where principals actually show up.
Founder Wisdom:
Never lead with “I’m raising.” Lead with a mission or problem statement that ties to their legacy. Reference a recent move or value they care about. Make them believe you’re additive before you ask for capital.
Tough Love Corner
A founder emailed me:
“Hey Mariya, I don’t know if you’ve been through this, but I could use some perspective. I run a consultancy that just passed 13 people - 5 of them I added in the last 3 months. Instead of things getting lighter, margins are tighter and I’m more stuck in delivery than ever. Client escalations are up, and 3 legacy clients churned recently. Do I scale back and fix systems first, or is this just me not knowing how to handle growth yet?”
This is the moment founders don’t expect: headcount goes up, but so does chaos. It’s normal. And fixable.
The rule: don’t scale back the dream, scale back the chaos.
Get clear on three things:
Delivery: What breaks when you’re not in the room? Fix that first.
Ownership: Who owns outcomes, not just tasks? If it’s still you, you’re the bottleneck.
Clients: Which ones move the business forward? Cut or reprice the rest.
If it were me, I’d:
Track my time for a week and kill at least 30% of what’s on my plate.
Document key systems with Loom/Notion so others can step in.
Sketch a delivery org chart, who reviews, who owns, who manages.
Drop or reprice unprofitable clients, fast.
Growth should buy you freedom. If it doesn’t, the machine needs a redesign.
Got a burning founder question?
Send it my way, just hit reply.
Founder’s Toolbox
Hunting for family offices? Start here:
144 Family Offices→ Curated list of active players.
OpenVC Family Offices → Public list you can filter by region & stage.
Before you dive in, remember: family offices might be your people if:
Your values actually align.
You build trust before asking for capital.
You’re playing decades, not quarters.
Think of them as marathon partners, not sprint coaches.
If you’re building something real, with purpose and early momentum? That’s your moat.
See you next Thursday,
— Mariya
What did you think of today’s issue?
Hit reply and let me know. I read every single one (for real).
About me
Hey, I’m Mariya, a startup CFO and founder of FounderFirst. After 10 years working alongside founders at early and growth-stage startups, I know how tough it is to make the right calls when resources are tight and the stakes are high. I started this newsletter to share the practical playbook I wish every founder had from day one, packed with lessons I’ve learned (and mistakes I’ve made) helping teams scale.
